The Composition (II)

I am going to write my composition as originally I wrote, in order to compare with the composition corrected by my teacher taking notes on mistakes.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
COMPOSITION

Thinking about this exercise and looking for related information I have found a list of ten things that will change the way we live these things are:

• Fuell cells
• Gene therapy
• Haptics
• Internet 2
• Lifestraw
• MRAM (Magnetoresistive Random Access Memory)
• $100 laptop
• $200 Barrel of oil
• VoIP (Voice Over Internet Protocol)
• WiMax (worldwide Interoperability for Microwave Access)

I knew almost a bit of all these technologies and inventions, but the lifestrow it was something I hadn't listen before so I will speak about it.

If someone ask us with is the most precious liquid on the earth, we could ask the oil, but then we will be wrong because it's the water. But there is a big problem because even though more than 70% of surface's earth is covered by water, many parts of world specially the poors parts with a big population are suffering from waterbourne diseases due to the unsafe water. Lifestraw is a portable water purification tool that cleanses surface water and makes it safe for human consumption.
It's just 25 cm long and 29 mm in diameter and can be hung around the neck. Lifestraw requires no electrical power or spare parts. Lifestraw filters up to 700 litres of water and effectively removes most of the micro organisms responsible for causing waterborne diseases.

It's clear that this invetion won't change our lives in a direct way, but it will improve the living conditions of millions people in around the world. I hope this invention become on of the most succesful development in the next years with a suceessful implantantion in the third world.
-----------------------------------------------------------------